


Obey Me: 20 truths and fictions

by Obeymepoptart



Category: Shall We Date?: Obey Me!
Genre: 20 Random Facts, Fluff and Crack, Fluff and Humor, Gen, My First Fanfic, Not Beta Read, Randomness, Tooth-Rotting Fluff, What Have I Done
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-06-08
Updated: 2020-06-08
Packaged: 2021-03-04 07:07:15
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 970
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24609655
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Obeymepoptart/pseuds/Obeymepoptart
Summary: Your time in Devildom and living with seven demon brothers has made you aware of a few facts.
Comments: 3
Kudos: 85





	Obey Me: 20 truths and fictions

**Author's Note:**

> Also cross-posted in Tumblr.

**1\. Fiction:** Mammon spends the most money.  
**Fiction:** Asmodeus spends the most money.  
**Fact:** Leviathan spends the most money. Totaling his monthly expenditures on games, manga, movies, art books, figurines, and all of his other hobbies, Leviathan outspends Mammon by 30%.

**2.** Leviathan makes his money however through running a very successful ebay store. Since he tends to buy in bulk, he sells a portion of what he buys to other otaku collectors online.

**3\. Fiction:** Belphegor has the worst attendance.  
**Fiction:** Mammon has the worst attendance.  
**Fact:** Leviathan has the worst attendance. He is constantly skipping classes due to raids. Despite it all, his GPA is in the top 10, which is more than you can say about Mammon’s GPA.

**4.** Belphegor’s GPA is not in the top 10 either, but it is in the top 15. Everyone knows he could be a top-ranked student, but it would be a bad look for the Avatar of Sloth to be considered diligent.

**5\. Fiction:** Lucifer has the biggest library.  
**Fiction:** Satan has the biggest library.  
**Fact:** Leviathan has the biggest library if you count graphic novels as books, which Leviathan does, and his brothers refuse to do.

**6.** While everyone knows that Beelzebub is constantly hitting the gym, his most common work-out buddy is actually Mammon. Mammon is the noisiest and whiniest gym buddy ever, and refuses to do multiple reps without complaining loudly to anyone who will listen about how he doesn’t need to do this.

**7.** Despite not working out, Asmodeus has a better cardio endurance than Beelzebub does. No one ever asks Asmo what he is doing to keep in shape. In fact, no one likes to talk about any sort of physical activity around Asmo.

**8\. Fiction:** Lucifer likes his coffee black.  
**Fiction:** Lucifer prefers tea to coffee.  
**Fact:** Lucifer likes his coffee with a little bit of cream and sugar. He needs a little bit of sweetness to fuel him through his report writing for Lord Diavolo. He has imposed a strict limit of only two of Barbatos’ cookies a day or his waistline would explode.

**9\. Fiction:** Luke makes the best cookies.  
**Fiction:** Barbatos makes the best cookies.  
**Fact:** Beelzebub makes the best cookies. No one ever rarely gets to eat said cookies, because 90% of the time, Beel just eats the raw cookie dough. Belphie manages to convince him every once in a while to WAIT, and actually bake the cookies and so far has been the only one to eat said cookies. Everyone thinks Belphie says Beel makes the best cookies out of sibling loyalty.

**10\. Fiction:** Asmodeus uses the most hair products.  
**Fiction:** Mammon uses the most hair products.  
**Fact:** Satan uses the most hair products. Nobody knows this because no one has ever seen his bathroom.

**11\. Fiction:** Lucifer is the most difficult demon to summon.  
**Fiction:** Satan is the most difficult demon to summon.  
**Fact:** Belphegor is the most difficult demon to summon. Most of the time, he literally cannot be bothered to appear even if you do everything right. Chances are, he’s napping and refuses to astrally project to whoever is attempting to summon him.

**12.** Beelzebub is the easiest demon to summon. In fact, he was once summoned with a half-eaten Snickers bar.

But just because he’s easy to summon doesn’t mean he actually stays. Once the food is gone, he’s gone.

**13.** In history, only one human being has managed to successfully make a pact with Beelzebub. It happened in the mid-20th century, and he feels duty-bound to make a stop whenever he sees a pair of golden arches.

**14\. Fiction:** Asmodeus has the most expensive wardrobe.  
**Fiction:** Mammon has the most expensive wardrobe.  
**Fact:** Lucifer has the most expensive wardrobe. While Mammon has a ton of modeling clothes, and Asmodeus has the most number of articles of clothing, all of Lucifer’s clothing is one of kind, custom made and made of the most expensive materials in three different realms.

**15\. Fiction:** Lucifer’s possessions are the hardest to get a hold of.  
**Fiction:** Satan’s possessions are the hardest to get a hold of.  
**Fact:** Belphegor’s possessions are the hardest to get a hold of. Belphie is such a paranoid asshole that he literally has secreted all of his personal items, aside from his pillow which he carries with him at all times, into a dream spell he created and bothered to teach no one. His brothers, except for Lucifer, think he’s just not that materialistic.

**16\. Fiction:** Mammon is the messiest brother.  
**Fiction:** Satan is the messiest brother.  
**Fact:** Asmodeus is the messiest brother. He has so many clothes, beauty products, make up palettes, sex toys, and assorted paraphernalia that keeping his bedroom organized requires not one, but three, different cleaning and sorting spells.

**17.** Out of all of the brothers, Leviathan has the most experience in the human world. Most of it is centered in the last forty years, thanks to anime conventions, anime movies, the global rise of K-Pop and J-Pop. In fact, Leviathan has gone to more concerts in the human world total than all of his six brothers combined ever.

**18.** Lucifer’s only music festival was Woodstock 1969. Lord Diavolo dragged him to see Jimi Hendrix play. Lucifer takes a dim view of human musical festivals since.

**19.** Belphegor is responsible for the current bed in a box trend. He did it to celebrate their combined birthdays (his - mattresses) and Beel’s (take out boxes). He did not expect it to catch on.

**20.** All of the demon brothers hate underwear. Underwear is strictly a human invention. The only reason to wear underwear is for someone to take it off, according to Asmo. Or working out, if you ask Beel. However, on a day to day basis, they all refuse to wear underwear.

**Author's Note:**

> ... why am I obsessed with thinking about this game?


End file.
